Lothed in Transition

Finally, something new...

2007-03-20T12:38:00.000+02:00

Well, blogger ate my post (a few days ago...)

Sigh. And you wonder why I've been so quiet. This isn't the first time.

So giving up on doing the update again, I still have way too much work to do this twice, I have a new phone number due to the last phone being pick-pocketed from me on Saturday. If you want it and haven't had a mail from me already email me on my first name dot my surname at gmail dot com.

I can't access excite really anymore, so I can't really access any email addresses I have there either. Sadly. Bloody spammers.

Merry Christmas

2006-12-24T14:57:00.000+02:00

Well, I thought in the spirit of it all I'd wish all my friends, family and anyone else who happens to read this a very merry Christmas, whatever your faith or denomination may be. I wish all of you a time of joy, love and fellowship.

That aside, I'm suffering the Cape Town heat and trying to decided whether the torrential rain in Johannesburg would make a nice alternative? As an ex-Capetonian I do have a high tolerance for pissing rain, and in fact, I actually rather enjoy it much of the time, provided it doesn't last toooo long (a week) and isn't tooo cold (below 19 degrees C) and preferably when it's over a holiday so I can appreciate it from my bed.

None-the-less the days have been lovely here and I can't wait till the three day family rigmarole is over so I can actually show my boyfriend something of the place!

Despite this, he has been well amused by the vehicle's driven by the younger more testosterone filled members of the Cape Flats population. Whooo wee. It's bad.

Out, out damn spot!

2006-12-06T12:43:00.000+02:00

Whoa! Not cool!

I just go stuck three times with a needle in a hunt for veins.

This is partially my own fault. I'm due to donate blood and I didn't want the nice lady Doctor to use the convenient vein I donate from since this will prevent me from donating for an indeterminate period. So after the one I used to use gave no joy she tried the back of my right hand - the veins there being fairly thick and promenant. No joy there either.

(And blimey but does a needle in the hand hurt, both during insertion and afterward.)

Finally we gave up and used the easy one. And boy, did it gush!

I was a little tense after this, but mostly fine. I had enough cute snowmen and candy-cane plasters to make make me look like a chistmas tree and a cool story to make my office mates squirm.

However I was halfway out of Sandton (Daarling) when I noticed that the plaster was feeling a little cool and soggy. I put my hand to it and looked down at my studdenly damp hand to find my fingers squelched with blood.

A brief second of panic and I rummaged in my bag-of-many-things for a tissue. That seen-too I hit upon using my stretchy, beaded bracelets as a make-shift touniquette and I walked to the parking pay-machine feeling now somewhat shaken and a little embarrased.

It's become such a total taboo these days to bleed. Blood has always had a power over the imagination, but ever since HIV and AIDs has become the modern-day bogey man blood has become something to shy from like a poison serpent or a spray of acid.

While I know I'm clean - the re-proving of that being the mission of the day on command from my insurance brokers - the man in the, er, mall doesn't and I'm behoven to try my best not to get blood well, anywhere really.

That said the royal-we are all fine now... except the hand which pulls occasionally as I type. Gym's going to be so much fun!

Call of the dark-side!

2006-12-05T13:58:00.000+02:00

I am gradually working toward completing my transformation from chronically uncertain and responsibility-lacking post-teen to moderately-slack pseudo-yuppie.

The step completed yesterday was to sign up for a gym contract with the joys of Discovery Vitality. Cheap contracts! Yay!

Seeing that within limits, I actually like exercise, I don't think going twice a month to keep the contract active will be too difficult. Plus Tony and his friend Brett started going to the gym twice a week and I'm going to join them on Mondays from now on. I'll probably aim to go on my own at other times, especially since I get equal access to 2 other Virgin Actives in the area. I like gymming in the morning, but I don't know that I can face the 5am wake up to do it... not yet at least, maybe if I get addicted...

Meanwhile I've been making friends with Liz, my new physio - since Lala is a little far away. She's been trying to sort out my groin muscles and ankle. Strangely it's the ankle that providing the greatest trouble. It's been 6 weeks since the grading and it's still very unhappy. Admittedly, I did manage to twist it twice after the grading, once very badly 4 days after, and then a mild twist more recently. They booby-trapped me as I was exiting the physio by washing the tiled ramp that comes up to the front door - and there's no second option of stairs...

Next things on the list are, of course, to move out to which purpose Tony and I are currently collecting usefulls. We bought some really nice, matching wine glasses and tumblers this weekend and a Morphy Richards microwave in brushed steel last weekend. This weekend we might invest in the matching apple-red kettle and toaster we saw while shopping for said microwave.

Then once all that is over, I need to start saving for a new car!

Over-worked and over-worked

2006-11-29T16:00:00.000+02:00

Work has been hard of late. I'm not used to chasing deadlines on projects of this sort of magnitude, I'm used to a fair mix of projects ranging from the epic (like all the ones I do these days it seems) to the mini. This meant it felt like you accomplished something during a day by clearing your place of all the little things. Now there are no 'little things' and only a constant slog toward a short-term goal that by the time you're don all you can muster is vague relief before plunging headlong into the next thing. Of course, this being design, often the project you've completed rises up to demand attention once more and then you have to juggle that with all the new projects.

This way of working has been slowly wearing me down over the past few months since I can't keep up this pace unabated for so little reward. Most of what we do is free pitches, which 80% of the time means your work is discarded. Then if the client chooses it, they often proceed to pull it apart until it bears only passing resemblance of your original creation. There's no work-satisfaction payoff, plus I'm working harder and for longer hours than I ever have in my life as yet.

My sole consolation is that I as least have coworkers now, even if they are a bit of a mixed bag and my creative director can be moodier than a 15-year old girl, and the senior designer is a hypercondriac with deep-seated issues and ADD. Half the time the staff seem to add to the stress and tension rather than providing a vent for it. No-one here will take the blame for anything and it results in so much bitchiness with everyone trying to play the naming game. Us three in the design department mostly try to keep our heads down, but every-so-often we still need to defend our honor, especially against DTP who're ready to blame everything on us 'useless designers'.

The net result has meant not much time to blog really. So quicky: I've graded to orange in Jitsu, I'm going to physio a lot to recover from the injuries I got before and during the grading, I've passed all my PR assignments and I'm failing to study for the exam in January, I've started writing a LARP with Annick which promises to be lots of fun, Tony and I invested in a rather nice microwave on the weekend - our first homeware purchase, I'm aiming to start gym on Monday and as implied by the homeware purchase, Tony and I are still going strong, even if he manages to be a total bitch to half my friends. Sigh.

Sorry for you.

2006-10-11T10:38:00.000+02:00

I had an update. I promise. It was a little whiny, so maybe you're better off without it, but seeing as I'm ill and under stress it's hard to be positive.

Unfortunately my decrepid, decaying, piece of shit mac died on me just as I was about to push "publish".

So maybe next week.

Right.

2006-10-05T19:25:00.000+02:00

So I have this new job, and I'm working so hard that I have waaay less 'me' time during office hours than ever before, I get to work almost an hour earlier than I did at VI and rarely leave at our official finish time of 16h30, in fact I'm at the office now, gone 7pm, working on a hectic deadline, my computer is in the process of having some sort of hardware failure on me and despite all this I am so much happier than I was a the last place.

I'm sorry I haven't updated - I started last week, but my degenerative Mac crashed on me and ate it.

I'm off to dinner with Sed in a few minutes and thought I'd type this up quick while I avoid doing the next step in the group structure I'm building.

Hopefully I'll be more eloquent and informative soon, but don't hold your breath - I'm having to much fun having actualy people to talk to again.

Gone and done it now

2006-08-22T17:42:00.000+02:00

I resigned today.

The boss took it very well. (Suspiciously well?)

He was a bit horrified that my contract allows me to give two weeks notice, though. We haven't said anything further really, he's been out the office and I'm too busy to care.

I've been loaded with more work that it's humanly possible for me to finish within the allotted time, unless I pull two succesive all-nighters.

I have no intention of doing this however. Much of the work was waiting for my from when I took leave to go to Cape Town this weekend, and it's been a point of resentment since day one that any leave I take essentially amounts to 'time in lieue'. Even were I staying in this job I think I'd be throwing my toys out the cot about now, and since I'm not I'm just going to cheerfully work hard, work late, but far from kill myself. Heck, it's not like they can fire me!

I was lovely to see Cape Town again, and even better to share it with Tony.

The weather sort of came to the party, but it sat in the corner and begrudged most of it till the end. On a wet Friday morning (well, afternoon really, but what's a holiday if you can't sleep in?) we set sail for Franschoek, with a less than brief stop at Fairview where we samples and bought some fantastic wines.

Saturday was Groot Constantia, with a brief 'hello' to the morning Dragonfire crowd and then off to shop for the dinner I was cooking. Too much time on my recently over-coddled feet, but the dinner was good enough to make up for it. Even my introverted boyfriend enjoyed himself enough to add to the conversation!

Sunday would have been lovely, had I been able to say 'no' to freelance work and if Tony hadn't succumbed to some Capetonian cold-virus. We took a drive over Silvermine, had lunch at the Brassbell and had a quick tea with my granny. I'd hoped to make it to the Dragonfire after-party, but I didn't finish work in time.

Finally on Monday I rummaged through my old stuff for more plunder to take back to Jozi with me, and then we paid a free visit to the Aquarium, courtesy of Mum, who's currently the chairperson of their volunteer committee and has recently achieved 10 years of service to them!

The flight back was well, only unusual in that I had company. Much as we enjoyed our time in Cape Town both of us were well glad to be back in dry and elevated Johannesburg. I noticed the faint smell of woodsmoke in the air for the first time and I was deeply please to know that I was going to spend the night in my own bed.

Clarity?

2006-08-14T13:42:00.000+02:00

I'm a little confused at the moment.

It seems I have a new job. It is, however, not certain.

I've been for three interviews, including the less-than-enjoyable HR interview this Friday gone; having pretended to go for a Doctor's appointment, proving that every cloud has a silver lining and my toe hasn't totally been a bad thing - having also facilitated the second interview somewhat indirectly. During the second interview the incoming Creative Director, Warren, (who I deeply suspect of being gay, but this is Design, you can never quite be certain) kept winking at me in a conspiratorial fashion. Ever since I first met him at the second interview he's been acting like my appointment is a done deal, in fact everyone has, except no-one has actually said it.

I've even been told by Warren to keep the 27th clear so I can come to a get-together he's having for what will be his, and my, new co-workers. He only starts officially on the 28th, you see.

This morning HR called to ask how much I'd be willing to contribute to a medical aid, implying they're calculating an offer for me. But none of this is 100% conclusive; I still can't count my chickens.

It's a little annoying and a little bewildering really.

In other news Tony and I hied ourselves off to Decorex on Saturday, me limping around in my slipper while we attempted to discover if, when, we have the joy of having to kit out a living space for the two of us how great the likelihood is that the relationship will end right there in a furious argument about the size, shape and colour of the couch. Fortunately it appears that provided I don't indulge in my fancy for tribal African fetish dolls, masks and cushion covers, or make the bedroom into an over-decorated Indian-themed boudoir of kitsch we should be fine. Sadly it also appears that our tastes run to far to expensive for our current means, although that could have a lot to do with the exhibitors generally not being in the budget category.

Despite still being mostly confined to wearing slippers, since all my shoes flex at just the wrong point, I am at least back to being able to drive. Although it is all a little silly what with me having to put on 'real' shoes to drive, and then take them off when I get to work, spend the day in slippers and then put back on the shoes to go home. Thankfully I don't have a formal work environment, or need to interact with clients. I have been catching myself glaring enviously at anyone in my vicinity who sports an attractive pair of heels though.

Finally. Yes, I know I'm often a little oblivious and slow. Especially in this case. I'd been half thinking I should take my name off this blog, seeing as there aren't a hell of a lot of web active people with my name in this world. Happy as I am Ticktock found me, there is no-one else I desire to have 'find me', especially not future employers and even more especially not my current ones. It was only really struck home when having contemplated this last Sunday I woke up on the Monday morning to discover the radio DJ (Gareth Cliff) having a long discussion on 'identity surfing' (not that he called it that) in reference to googling your dates. While I know that the VI crew are a leeetle behind the times, if the idea of googling for people is being discussed in the mainstream media it's time for me to stop being such a bloody naive idiot.

Done gone broke it!

2006-07-27T13:27:00.000+02:00

Whee! I broke it. Smooshed.

My toe that is. The middle bone is well shattered. Fortunately the pieces haven't separated, so it'll heal without surgery.

At least it means I'm not a total girl for breaking into tears round 2 or 3pm the last two nights when the exhaustion and pain got too much for me. Seeing as it's been too sore to sleep with that is.

I now have a bit of tape, some anti-inflammatories and some painkillers that will hopefully have more effect than the two generic Myproldol clones I took last night. I mean 20mg of codiene didn't even really dent the pain.

Oh well, at least I now know what's wrong. This is my first broken bone at the illustrious age of 27. And not exactly a glorious one to break either.

How I broke it is an equally inglorious tale. There's this game we play sometimes when warming up for judo, which I have always loathed. It's called Belt Soccer, and is played in our judo wear (barefooted), with chairs at each end of the mat for goal posts and a large square chunk of foam for a ball. It's called belt soccer since you're allowed to take your gi belt, fold it over a few times and use it as a floppy club to hit the ball with.

The reason I've always loathed Belt soccer is since I've always reckoned it's a barrel of injuries waiting to happen. I think this is karma, I'm being punished for enjoying being right so much.

So there I was foolishly almost starting to enjoy myself, I kicked for the 'ball' that was infront of me and... Someone proceeded to put their foot down on the lump of foam, and my toe connected at full swing with the boney back of their ankle.

Whoever it was must have had ankles of steel, since I was the only one jumping up and down wincing in agony.

So that's me out of doing much in the way of training for the next month. Bloody typical.

Owh, owh, bugger, owh!

2006-07-26T14:12:00.000+02:00

It's clearly not my week (or should that be weeks?)

They were to cheap here to hire any freelancers while I was off for Tony and Katy's wedding and ICON so I came back to more than a week's work of work patiently waiting for me.

Due to the time off I've also lost the innurement that I'd built up to all the things that upset, anger or irritate me about my job situation, so I'm back to square one with hating everything here.

On top of that they seem to be taking me even more for granted - if that's possible. It's also be nice to be working for someone who, after six months in their employ, can actually remember your name more than 50% of the time. As Liz, less than cheerfully, points out this is a fair sign of how much I, as an individual, matter to them.

It doesn't help either that I've been for an interview with one of their competitors and I dearly want that job, but haven't heard anything yet which is driving me crazy. Tony's advice is to care less and act like I haven't got it - which isn't bad advice, I'm just not having much luck following it (although with every day that passes without me hearing anything, I'm becoming more convinced that I may well be out of the running. To my deep disappointment.)

Further joys of being the sole designer include the fact that if I take sick leave, no-one picks up the pieces and makes my deadlines for me, which really really sucks.

Especially now that I've managed to dislocate two joints of my left big-toe at the same time leaving me practically crippled for the moment. I can't drive, I can hardly walk, I've been in constant pain since yesterday evening and even the best painkillers hardly dent it. It was so bad that I only managed to snatch sleep last night when the exhaustion overcame the agony.

Despite that, here I am at work.

Jeepers. I'm so happy. I feel so valued. I love everyone.

Set sail for the future!

2006-06-30T14:32:00.000+02:00

With a quite 'plink' of my inbox the process of steering my life in a new direction begins.

I've come to realise that I need to apply more focus to my goals in life - where I want to go and how I'm going to go about getting there. I've been toying with the idea of studying further for about a year now. Ever since I realised that sadly I can't really travel on my qualification as a Graphic Designer as we're dime a dozen and I'm decent, but not brilliant.

I always knew that at some point I'd have to make a career change. Designers either burn out or give up and there are not a lot of positions open to those who are considered ageing and less 'hip', and there's also not a lot of room at the top of the tree for those considered to be 'senior or heavy weights'. The fact that people are considered to be a Senior designer after a period of only five or six years should give you an idea of the longevity of the average designer's career. And hell, it's going to take me more than a few years to build up to the qualification I'm looking for, so I need to start the ball rolling now.

So, I've decided to move towards Marketing and Client Services - it's related, but I think with time and training I may well do better there than I ever have as a Graphic Designer. There's also a greater chance of me getting hired as in that field than as a 'foreign designer' in the UK - since I have every intention of going back.

So I've signed up with a distance learning institution to do a 6 month course in PR as starters. If that goes well and I cope with additional demand of studying added to the already full schedule of work, martial arts, role-playing, relationship and friends I'll then consider taking the next, more ambitious step I've got planned.

It's somewhat amazing to consider that all this is motivated by my loyalty to TJF Jujitsu. My greatest goal at the moment is to make it to brown-belt, so like Davis I can start my own club where ever I may choose. I early want to be back in a country where I can train whenever I choose with a variety of people and not feel constantly that I'm being held back by unfortunate circumstances. It also helps that I have more close friends in London right now than I have anywhere else on this planet (although it'll be just typical that they'll all leave just as I get my act together and head back for the UK...)

Filthy, little, capitalist, colour facists!

2006-06-22T09:48:00.000+02:00

This morning is the first time I've really had an opportunity to use the Internet Archives, and I have to say I'm sold!

What a brilliant plan! Lordy knows how they afford all that sortage space but bless their little geek hearts.

A few months back I found a brilliant website that lists every Pantone colour along with breakdowns of these colours into print (CMYK process) and web (RGB hexcode) versions. It also gives far more accurate breakdowns than can be achieved by dropping the Pantone colour into Freehand or Photoshop's conversions (which also don't contain the latest 300 or 400 hundred colours in their libraries) and it's been an invaluable resource for me, especially with my current agency having buckets of trouble with colour matching in the past.

Now of course, Pantone makes money off their system and the multitude of very expensive books and guides they sell to all those who deal with colours in print. There's one for each stock of paper, pastels, metalics, muted tones and additional guides that match Pantone to process or RGB and display the comparisons - all of which they try to tell you are indispensible and must be changed every year since wear and the aging of the inks and papers will alter the appearance of the colours!

So of course, sometime in the last couple of weeks someone at Pantone must have come across this site two, got in a little frothy about it and demanded it removed before they take legal action. So with a quiet apology in German most of which I find incomprehensible the site has removed the chart leaving me bereft and cursing my foolish nature to trust that such a resourse would always be there. Why, oh why didn't I save the page earlier.

Dun du la dah! Enter internet archives to the rescue and - there it is! My lovely colour page in all it's technicolour glory, ready for me to save for posterity! Happy happy joy joy.

Oh, and praise be to Andy for telling me about the internet archives! Wheew.

Meanwhile in other news I'm trying to figure out how much I of my life I feel like sacrificing to be able to potentially change my career. Looks like a BComm with Unisa will take me 6 years at a managable pace of study and seeing as I've only been out of Tech for 5 I don't think I can stomach that prospect at this moment. On the other hand they offer a 6 month course in Public Relations which might add a little more interest to my CV and perhaps allow me to sidle that little bit closer to going into client relations... Without sacrificing every ounce of spare time I posess for rest of my fading 20's and early 30's. However, I have one week to make up my mind in or hold my peace for the next 6 months.

Orange is a good colour

2006-05-23T16:06:00.000+02:00

The week has not been a grand one so far. I woke up yesterday morning feeling like grandma once again. A gift of our mock-grading the previous day, along with the two orange stripes to add to my belt, signifying I'm now a very unofficial orange belt.

I needed to get into the office post-haste which meant joining the rush hour traffic I usually manage to avoid. Having left a full half hour early I made it in a whole fifteen minutes early to hand Darnell the proofs that I'd spent three hours of my Sunday night organising and checking.

Liz, the oft-mentioned DTP operator, had managed to get a stomach bug on top of all the other illnesses that have plagued her for the last few nightmarish weeks of work-load hell. No-one realised this, bar presumably her, and despite it being her birthday on Saturday her children didn't come to visit her. This meant that the first time anyone knew anything was when my bosses panicked at her uncharacteristic lack of communication and the fact that she hadn't come into the office to fetch the work she'd said she would.

They tried every means of contacting her, phone, family and friends to no avail and eventually tracked down her home address and went round. With no response at the door, but her car in the garage, they called emergency services and broke into her house to find her so ill that she'd been unconscious for a substantial while and she was rushed to the nearest ICU where she remains, last I heard, conscious but too dehydrated and weakened to leave.

This meant the ball has dropped somewhat, our reports are delayed and freelancers have been called in a last ditch attempt to plug the leaking dyke - however much of the pressure has also been landed squarely on my shoulders. Having come down with an ill-timed and total unforeshadowed cold on Saturday morning I have not been in the best of moods or states to face the trails of the last few days. Especially as my beloved Orange Avenger that is Cal-C-Vita hasn't been able to do much more than mitigate my cold to the sorry snuffling stage of things.

Hence I can't believe it's only Tuesday!

A short-yet-sweet comment from a long lost friend and my belated discovery that the CLAWsWiki is back up, prompting a dip into my old blog archives has added an air of sureality to this fledgling week only held in check by the fact that I've not been adding painkillers to my sinus meds.

All I can say is: Can I have back whatever I was on when I wrote those early blogs, 'cause it looks like it must have been the good stuff?

They want what!?!

2006-05-18T15:49:00.000+02:00

Have I mentioned I hate clients?

I probably have, plus as it's one of the oft lamented pitfalls of being a designer I usually don't feel the need to reiterate it on a constant basis.

I've been designing yet another cover for yet another annual report and I included on it a lovely quote by some antique holy guy, 15th century monk or the like, who had to say; "The path to greatness is along with others". Lovely, inspiring, and totally appropriate since their theme is Teamwork.

I didn't credit the quote since Patricia said it wasn't necessary. Now today I finally get the client's input back and they've gone and decided that they're better copywriters than, well, us and/or the dead guy and have crossed out 'path' and written in 'strategy' and 'others' is edited to 'people'. Just to push the point home that they're a small-minded group of corporate wankers incapable of accepting anything with even a slightly metaphorical leaning.

Apparently they tore the design of Brian, a mind-bogglingly brilliant freelance designer we occasionally use when Darnell thinks that his current designer is too busy or insufficiently talented, into itty little bits since he used a lot of dynamic red and orange arrows to imply movement and flow (they deal with supply chains and fleet financing i.e. getting stuff places) as they though the share holders might believe that this meant that they'd actually had a good year! Which they hadn't, it has only been an average year. Heavens forbid!

Anyway this means the poetic quote has been mutilated to read "The strategy to greatness is along with people." Deep inside my soul howls in agony. I mean is that even English?

Bloody hell!

2006-05-12T10:04:00.000+02:00

Two of our client are late with the copy for their annual reports and Liz, the DTP operator is sick! This means that work will need to be done this weekend. Fair enough, my bosses say they're getting a freelancer in to support Liz, but apparently I will need to come in too.

Liz and the freelancer will both get paid overtime rates for this extra work, I on the other hand will get f'all, except the pleasure of 'doing my duty'. Do I have a right to utterly livid over this? 'cos I am. I'm sorry, it's not my fault the client aren't following schedule, or that Liz is 'understaffed', she's our supplier and she should sort it out herself. I know that deadlines are important, but I don't see why I should be dragged into it, for little too no reward.

Sigh, I need to vent. My mood is not helped by the fact that I was in the office till quarter to ten last night. Partially my fault for being unable to focus on Wednesday.

I also have a suspicion that my body is struggling to fight off the germs from Liz and Darnell - or possibly Tony, since he was feeling a little down on Wednesday.

Angry angry angry.

I'm not having a good side of the bed month so far.

Plus I want my contract and I want more f'ing money!!!

I also want to go watch Freshly Ground at the Bassline tonight, but at a hundred bucks a ticket I'm not taking Tony who'd hate it, and I don't have anyone else to subsitute him for. :(

I wish I had a tail, just so I could twitch it right now. Tapping an eraser on my notepad just doesn't have the same effect, no matter how agressively I do it.

Ooooh, and my insurance are wankers, I told them I've moved to Joburg and they've doubled my premiums. I'm sorry there's no way in hell I should be paying just short of half a grand a month for a car that's almost a decade old and worth around 30k! You've got to be shitting me!

Now if I can focus long enough to finish my current work I'm going to start getting competitors insurance quotes.

Grrr.

Assorted update

2006-05-05T15:03:00.000+02:00

Ugh. It's a Friday afternoon, and I've been left with a little work, but nothing that I'm in the mood for. Requires too much conceptual thinking, and I'm not feeling particularly focused or creative.

I've noticed that Gmail keeps crashing Safari... Might have to get Mozilla, but I have no idea if Gmail even supports Mozilla on the Mac. Will research.

Also finally getting my arse in gear to find accommodation for Tony and Katie's wedding. All fine and well being please as punch to be going, but if I can't find a bed for the nights there's not a lot of point.

Would also rather like to visit Cape Town later next month, but two holidays in two months is a little expensive on the pocket and the leave quota - plus my company will have a hissy fit if I leave them hanging too much. It's not as if I've got a co-worker to shoulder things onto, so without me either output grinds to a halt or they need to get a freelancer in for a week.

Life has been quiet, and work hasn't. Between overtime, hobbies and the odd bit of freelance work I've had little free time, so have been spending most the weekends doing something quiet with Tony. I'm usually too flat exhausted on Fridays to even think of going out.

We have managed to devour the entire of Firefly over the space of the long weekend as I wanted to watch them before watching Serenity, and Tony was happy to see them again. I can see, to some extent, what the fuss is about, but a large portion I believe is due to the series having become a martyr. Even so, deeply cool, and deeply sad we didn't get to see Josh weave another of the complex plot tapestries he proved himself so capable of with Buffy.

The circus comes to town...

2006-03-29T11:17:00.000+02:00

On Monday my brother gave me the news that he's be in Joburg in less than 24 hours time.

Apparently this was the same amount of warning that his company had give him.

After a bit of a stuggle to find out exactly where the boy was staying since in Gareth's mind the entire ring road is called the N3 - which it's not - so when I'm told he's staying near the N3 I think of 'South'. In fact he was staying about 10 minutes or so from home.

So after work, slightly delayed by having managed to choose exactly the worst routes to traverse to that end of Roodepoort (should have gone via Westdene rather than around it) I arrived at the lad's hotel to collect him.

'Little Capetown' aka Melville beckoned, mainly since it was close - and also I'd invited Lala to join us after judo. Also I'd decided that if Gareth had no preferences on what to eat I was going to haul him off to Sakura for sushi since a) it serves the best value for money sushi in Johannesburg and b) I knew Gareth had never been into a proper sushi bar before since as far as I know there aren't any in Cape Town.

Yum yum. I looove sushi. I'm such a glut for it! However yesterday was a little special since they had butterfish nigiri on the rotator. Now I've had butterfish sushi before and it's nice - although in maki I'm most fond of tuna - however this butterfish left every piece of sushi I've ever eaten standing in the dust. I was officially the best sushi I've ever eaten. I had to restrain myself from eating every plate of it off the bar - as it was Gareth and I shared two, and I stopped myself from eating the third on my own since that would have been a little too greedy - but next time I head for Sakura, butterfish nigiri will be the order of the day! Mmmmm....butterfish....

Achem, anyway, yes.

We then went next door to Six, a cocktail bar with a fairly substantial menu of some classics and a number of more off the wall options. The more unusual stuff tends to be a bit hit or miss, but they do do a good mohito and an excellent chocolate martini. Our waitress was utterly incompetent, but fortunately she disappeared later and a far more savy little gay lad took over.

The brother was also introduced to Tony and Lala (who has now met the entire of the Saul family, but fortunately only managed to offend one of them so far).

Blah, blah blah. Good time had by all... well, I hope so at least.

In other news I'm overworked and underpaid (which may or may not be true). I've pretty much decided I can't afford to face unemployment again and freelancing sounds like too much of a risk so I'm probably going to go permanent here. At least the work is interesting even if the methodology and my computer drive me mad. Life is good, if a bit too busy. I've been eating out too much and not getting to judo enough (there were no classes last week, and well, I had an unexpected visitor yesteday.) I'll go back on Thursday work-load permitting.

Grr...

2006-03-16T14:27:00.000+02:00

You know, I'm pretty stressed, and somewhat over-worked. (All of which makes my employer gleefull since he knows he's getting his money's worth, and just makes me bloody grupmy since it's his poor time management skills that have me up to my neck at this moment.)

I am not in the mood to figure out why Blogger has utterly failed to update my blog and if it's some weird 'ugh, no, not Mac' sort of issue.

I'm writing this in the vague hope that when I post it, both post will go up.

Grr...

Sleep is for the Weak!

2006-03-15T15:35:00.000+02:00

And I'm sooo weak...

Half of me is in pain, thanks to two days of training in a row. My neck consist of a few interlocking rods of steel - the aformentioned training, sitting in from of a computer all day, buckets of stress and Eric trying to wrentch it from my neck in an overly agressive irumi nage has all contributed to it's woes.

I've also been 'burning the candle at both ends' for the last few nights which Tony is so fond of castigating me over. Tonight will be no better with role-playing on the cards, and tomorrow I've got an all-nighter to pull in anticipation of a Friday afternoon deadline. Which I had better well make, seeing as I need to leave early for an interview with Kulula that afternoon. I'm going to be utterly buggered by this weekend. Okay, I'm utterly buggered now. I'm going to be death-warmed-over by the weekend.

It occured to me today that guy men on average possess much better taste and style than straight men, and lesbian girls on average are percieved to have much worse taste and style than straight girl. Bizarre yet appropriate role-reversal. Maybe the gene for liking men is linked to the gene for being able to coordinate one's wardrobe.

Hmmm.

Oh, well, I shall go put my nose back on the grindstone.

Rain, rain go away.

2006-02-27T10:53:00.000+02:00

I have a much higher rain tolerance than the average resident of Jo'burg, so when I say I'm sick of the rain, you've got to realise how badly it's upsetting everyone else. Yeah gods, am I sick of the rain!

It's been raining almost solidly for the entire month here - except for one week, which was the weird one with the vast swarms of butterflies.

Everything is waterlogged. The lawn at home is so bad that people visiting (and hence parking on it) have been gouging really really deep grooves in it since it's essentially a thin layer of grass over clay-mud. This gives very little traction and means that much extra wheel spinning is happening every time someone drives onto or off it. There's no way in hell it's going to recover before winter, and it may take a lot of digging to level it all again.

It has also not been helping my sinuses which have been feeling snuffly for weeks as a result of the damp. A cheerful reminder of one of the reasons I hate winters in Cape Town so passionately.

Traffic has also been suffering, and it's christmas for the panel beaters. I was very glad that the morning's rains had dried by the time we headed for Pretoria yesterday. I'm also very glad that none of the routes that I travel have much heavy traffic or high-accident zones, although I feel sorry for the road-works bunch since new pot-holes form on a daily basis. (Fortunately for us, with elections in the next few days these are being fixed almost as rapidly.)

I'm exceedingly glad to discover that my boss isn't back until Thursday! Yay! I thought he was back today, in fact. This is especially pleasant since I need to make a couple of print-outs of stuff for my portfolio and I was trying to figure out how to sneak them past Darnell this afternoon, and also leave in time to make it to my 17h30 interview in Bryanston in this weather! So all solved now. Double yay!

Of course my biggest joy is the fact that I go paid this weekend and so finally I've actually got the funds to do stuff again! And most importantly I can afford such luxuries as paying off my credit card, my rent and my vehicle-related debt to Grant.

Maybe not so much with the interesting...

2006-02-23T15:13:00.000+02:00

Why can't I live in a perfect world where everything goes my way?

Ah, well 's not to be so no point ball-aching about it.

I spent around 3 hours in my car yesterday - although, technically much of it wasn't driving since the traffic was so backed up in Jo'burg due to rains at rush-hour that I was stationary for much of that time. Rivonia is also the absolute worst part of Jo'burg to have to try to get anywhere near to at that time of the day - or leave for that matter. But the traffic yesterday was so bad that even at 19h30 it was still as bad as it is most days two hours earlier.

I arrived for role-playing almost two hours late. Although when I got there Russell was also delayed by computer issues (lightening fried modem and his mum wanting an email sent urgently...) and then it was supper so in the end we only actually started role-playing at nine o'clock. That said it was fun, and I think I'm going to enjoy this campaign - if my character lasts the next 48 hours. She's a new vampire who knows nothing, is extra susceptible to sunlight and has infact decided that the whole last few hours was a really bad trip and she and another character are off to a police station to report their kidnapping having ditched the rest of the party. So much to go wrong, so much fun to have! (hopefully someone will stop us before we get to the hospital...)

I was very glad to discover today that Wednesday next week is a public holiday. I was trying to figure out how to get a full work day and still find time to vote, so no prob now... although there has been a vague threat that we may have to work that day anyway due to jobs coming in at the start of next week. Sigh.

Catch up time

2006-02-22T16:30:00.000+02:00

I know I've been quiet, and it's not really from a lack of anything to say, rather than the lack of any time or inclination to say it.

The job is coming along alright, I've now been here for the better art of a month and I hasn't sent me running screaming yet. Although I have decided that it's not the permanent position for me and when my three month probation contract comes up, I'm not going to go permanent if I haven't found something else by that point. Instead I'm going to give Nikki's freelance agents a call since I reckon I can do well for a while as a freelance contractor - there's good money in it, and a variety of people to be met, since you'll often take fairly long contracts a big name agencies.

I've also got an interview this evening for a position at a company that I really like the sound of. They asked for a junior with 2 years of experience, but I applied anyway - on the grounds that they seem cool enough that I'm willing to take a bit of a title downgrade. I'm rather excited, but it does interfere with role-playing a bit this evening.

Under normal circumstances this wouldn't be a problem, but it happens that tonight is the start of our new World of Darkness: Vampire campaign using the new setting. Beyond the Mountains of Madness as run by Russell has failed once again to have the party make it to the ice (although at least they left the docks this time). Alan's sociopathic character decided that the only way to prevent a mutiny was to murder Starkweather with a straight razor while his cabin mate slept in the bunk above. Lacking it's leader, and having yet another crew member murdered the expedition had to be turned round and brought back to NY. I was sooooo miff, since I loved my character! (Although there is a vague promise that in three years or so when Vampire ends we'll have another stab at BtMoM and I can play Prof. Edward again - seeing as Alan's sociopath was on his second run...)

I've had my usual busy social-life. The BF, Tony, and I went for sushi on Valentine's - the food was good at the restaurant he chose, but the service was terrible and the atmosphere a little unfriendly.

Regarding martial arts I've been considering my options. There's been a bunch of issues about Jitsu, and essentially I can't make Monday night sessions as I'd get back from Pretoria too later and also I'm just generally too tired on Mondays to do anything more than go home and relax after work. While Sunday sessions are supposed to be happening more often, and the club moving to Joburg sometime this year, I've decided I need to relax my attitudes and attendance for a while.

I considered starting something else for a while - but the aikido club I went to seemed too meditation focused (15 minutes of synchronized breathing at the start was more than I can take). I've yet to find a Kung-fu class or the like that trains on a Tuesday and Thursday, plus Lauren has taken a job in the UK so will only be here for another month anyway. At the moment I'm doing judo with her once a week, which I've decided to just keep up with for the next month and then I'll contemplate alternatives again.

Anway, now that the news is out of the way, maybe I'll post something a little more interesting next time...

Alright, I give up!

2006-02-01T15:43:00.000+02:00

Well, the panic is over...mostly.

I've got myself a job. It's nothing to sing and dance about - not quite what I was aiming for, but things had come to the point that I couldn't hold out any longer. All in all it's not too bad a position - the perks being a fair salary, a relatively easy commute and being the sole dedicated designer in this little agency. This means that while I'm responsible to the Creative Director, Darnell, I'll get a hell of a lot more creative freedom here than I've received anywhere else - well, that's what I'm hoping...

The down side is that I'm the only real designer here, so all work is rapidly going to become my responsibility, and that I miss the comraderie that woking in a larger studio provides. It also means that when I'm having a bad day there's going to be nowhere to hide. Finally the major source of income here is annual reports, which is a fairly specialised field of design, which I have no experience in. Initially this isn't a bad thing, but I'm certain that in time the novelty will wear off and I don't want to be stuck as a 'corporate brochureware' designer for the rest of my life (which is where I'm on the fast track to at the moment).

Despite getting this week off to a slow start today hasn't been too bad since I'm indulging in the new experience of conceptualising and designing an annual report from scratch. I'm adopting a bit of a wait and see for the while about the job - I've got three months to make up my mind before I go permanent. Chances are I'll look and see if there is anthing definitely better that comes up - but making it to interview is going to be tricky what with the long hours I'm going to need to put it.

Otherwise jujitsu and judo are going well, and I'm having fun with both. Role-playing is role-playing, and we're getting bast the boring bit of Beyond the Mountains of Madness. We've already lost our first character before we even left the docks - so now I'm the only player playing a character of the opposite gender.

Most of all I'm looking forward to the point at the end of this month where I get to cease starting every sentence with "When I have money..." till then it's time to abuse the credit card.

Mixed Blessings

2006-01-11T14:01:00.000+02:00

Well, we're a way into the new year and not much has changed.

I'm back in Johannesburg, and so my connection to ADSL has gone once more. I'm still bored and unemployed - growing steadily broker by the day. Even the freelance work I had to keep me afloat last month has dried up what with all the businesses closing over the festive period. However, it's now a far better time of the year to be looking for work, so I'm somewhat optimistic.

Christmas was excellent. Three days of family as we combine the European tradition of Christmas eve supper, with the South African tradition of Christmas day lunch and then my gran has her birthday on boxing-day. This year it was her 90th, so a little more effort was put into having a lovely celebration lunch. And she's holding up faily well for her age, despite being mostly wheelchair-bound.

I do still persist in feeling a little saddened by how much our present christmas 'routine' has altered from my childhood - it's still enjoyable, but much of the magic has gone. Although much is salvaged by the fact that we still have a big christmas tree at home every year which I get to decorate!

I decided to return to Joburg for New Years, I though maybe this would make for a more, well, exciting one, but I then I never have much luck with NYE parties, and this year was no different. I landed up having to go to one house party, leave than and then travel to another which was miles away, and then head back to the first.

I hadn't really wanted to go to the second party, but it was combined with a friend's birthday, so I felt obliged to show my face. Along the way, despite harldy touching alcohol, I managed to land up feeling extremely nausous by 2am due some seafood paella I'd had at the second party coming to disagree with the large quanity of very artificial ginger cordial I'd swallowed. Food poisoning is not your friend.

I'm also hoping that it wasn't an indication of the year to come...

Well, it's time to say good-bye once again.

2005-12-28T23:54:00.000+02:00

Tommorow afternoon I'm flying back to Joburg in time for cheap flights and New Years. I'm hoping that the plane will be able to lift off safely despite the total howling gale that's afflicted CT at the moment.

I will miss my family, my friends, the mountain, fynbos, mother's cooking and adsl!

However, I'll have a few things to console myself with, never fear. I also have the task of find a job to undertake, and hopefully it will be an exciting and rewarding experience!

Although - considering I haven't done any of the work I intended to do on my portfolio or on self-promotional materials (I had other tasks! I've worked hard, I promise!) this might just turn out to be a gut-churning ride of pure stress and misery designed to shred my fragile self esteem.

Oh well.

I'll confess to being a leeetle pleased with myself though. I hied myself off to ShpatCon as a convenient way to see a few more people, played one module, had a really good time of it - great group of Simon, Brendan and newcomer, and Mike was an excellent DM - and actually managed to win best player for that module. Te hee. (They love me! They really love me! sob, sob)

And on that note I shall head for bed, to arise for an exciting day packing! Deciding what christmas loot I can fit in my luggage this time and what needs to be stored for later holidays. Oh joy!

Woe, oh, woe.

2005-12-13T01:57:00.000+02:00

Nothing quite like sitting up and trawling the web until supid AM to make you feel alone in the world. Alone and unloved.

Although perhaps that's just my standard Cape Town blues talking. In fact that's exactly what it is since well, while I'm technically alone at the moment (with sleeping parents in next room, sleeping brother one down, and bored cats making guest appearances) I'm far from unloved when I'm at home.

Amazing how fast they set in though. Small wonder I can't bring myself to stay here any longer than a nice holiday will dictate. Deepest tragedy. Feel my pain.

Anyway, the main point of this post, other than to keep me from bed for a futher 5 minutes, is to say to anyone who reads this and cares: "Heya, I'm in Cape Town for three weeks! Give me a call if you want to do something."

Damn me!

2005-12-02T14:16:00.000+02:00

It's official. I'm a typical woman.

Apparently I'm just never satisfied with the perfectly good options I've been given. Yep, I've just turned down yet another decent job.

Okay, it's not 100% certain it was mine, but it was pretty close. The guy has been calling me and one or two others up and asking us additional questions and also wanted me to go round to the studio again this afternoon to socialise a little with the other two designers so he can get some idea of how well we'll all mesh.

However, I'm surviving on the freelance stuff Rod's has given me, and while the place seemed acceptable, it 'wasn't going to further my long term goals'. He he.

Actually, I'm happier this way. I'm going to work on additional stuff for my portfolio, and also some little booky-mailer things that I can send to agencies in Joburg that I want to work for, so I reckon in the new year when the job markets open up I can sell myself to a lot better caliber of agencies. I feel like I'll have more potential!

In yet duller news I've discovered that my car's radiotor has a small leak. I now have to fill up with water pretty much every time I leave the house... just in case. When I drive to Pretoria tomorrow I'll need to take water with me so I can fill it up for the return journey.

Fortunately I'm only here for about another week so there's a radiator repair place nearby that Grant says he'll take my car to when I'm gone to get a quote. Joy.

Anyway, I need to head off home. I've done my work for the week and there is a swimming pool calling to me and a chicken I need to denude of it flesh, a sacrifice to chicken curry. (Athough the joy of cooking in our house is that I'm somewhat fussy, Grant's very slightly fussy, Tamara doesn't really like much meat other than chicken and Rudi's Jewish, so can't combine meat with dairy - it's a goddamn nightmare! And I'm going to discover if my curry works with coconut milk instead of cream...)

A lot of nothing much

2005-11-21T18:40:00.000+02:00

Well, I've been quiet.

This is because genreally things have been quiet. Status quo has been maintained.

In role-playing I've rejoined the old group for Beyond the Mountains of Madness. I'm rather fond of my new character, Edward Fitzgerald, and look forward to playing a 1930's geek slowly losing his grip on sanity.

I'm off to jitsu soon, like most Mondays, and on the 3rd I'm also helping Sensei Davis with his 'mock' grading.

I've been doing a bit of freelance work for my ex-coworker, Roddy, which is at least paying for my ticket back to Cape Town for Christmas. I'm arriving on the 12th and returning to Jozie on the 29th. I'm looking forward to having access to a decent computer screen and adsl, so that I can work on my portfolio so that someone will employ me somwhere nice!

Yah, well, as I said not a lot to say. Profound is hardly in my vocabulary at the moment. So, have a nice day.

Me like trees.

2005-11-01T16:49:00.000+02:00

I love Johannesburg and Pretoria in the spring. You see, at some point years and years ago the city councils got it into their heads that it would be a great idea to plant loads of jacaranda trees along the road sides.

This wasn't perhaps the most cunning plan, since the jacaranda berries are highly toxic and not child friendly, but most residents who lack diminutive offspring don't care since every spring before the jacaranda puts out its leaves it flowers first. If you don't know; the flowers are tubular and a shade of intense lilac and masses of them make each tree into a purple cloud. They also fall off prolifically, strewing the ground beneath each tree with a layer of purple snow. (Great to look at, but a bastard if you've got to park your cars beneath it.) Eitherway an avenue of jacaranda’s in full bloom is a magnificent thing!

Heh, random fact about Johannesburg - the natural vegetation that surround the city is savannah or scrub, however Northern Johannesburg is classed as 'forest' due to the huge density of trees and apparently is one of the world's largest man-made forests!

The latest unemployment news is, well, nothing. I haven't heard about the Cape Town job yet, I went to an interview this morning but we'll have to see how that goes. I've emailed my CV a few more places.

One positive was that at the end of the interview this morning the creative director I saw actually complemented my portfolio and even called me talented. If nothing else that put a smile on my face. I'm just hoping that when it finally does come time that I have a job again that I manage to find that 'talent' once more.

At last, the last!

2005-10-26T16:49:00.000+02:00

Well, I’ll get on with the last bit of my travel tale, although I’ll admit that it’s been so long in the telling I’m in danger of forgetting what the hell I did.

So I got back from Paris and headed home to re-pack and finish some odd tasks. It took me a bit longer than expected (but then doesn’t everything?) so I set out for Victoria a bit late, but managed to wrangle my way onto a bus leaving right there and then for Ringwood, in the New Forest.

I was going to visit a childhood friend of my mother’s, Ann who lives in the forest itself. It was a pleasant journey to Ringwood – the coach was nearly empty and I had plenty of space to stretch out, listen to mp3’s, read a book and watch the countryside go by.

Most of the time I spend with Ann was joyfully domestic in its way. Ann had come to stay with my family in South Africa some years ago, and it was good to see her again. She lives alone in quite a large house, teaches german part-time and ladles attention on her pets, especially Theo, the dog. It was lovely to visit her, I was so well looked after and we realised that we share a few more interests in common than expected.

We went for walks in the forest with Theo, took a drive through all the little New Forest towns. We also went down to the coast and took a walk along the boardwalk and had ice-cream at the beach – despite the weather being a little chilly. Ann fed me lovely breakfasts and suppers, she even packed me a lunch for my bus trip home!

I was sad to have to leave so soon, but glad that I’d finally managed to find a few days to relax. I left Ringwood on the Friday afternoon, specially timed that I’d make it back for my last session of Jitsu.

I was sad to say good-bye to everyone, and I’ve promised I’ll be back – someday. The next morning I was up early to pack, dashed down to Tooting to visit a friend, Claire, for her birthday, then dashed back. Alex met up with me and LaLa took us to Victoria to catch the express. Thank goodness for their help, since I had far to much luggage, and I would have been completely unable to manage it myself. Even Alex and I would have had trouble getting it through the tubes.

All worked out fine. I battered my eyelashes and managed to get a reduced charge for my excess baggage (and little did they know that Alex was round the corner with another 10 kilo’s of hand luggage..) We had a farewell drink and I boarded the plane for South Africa.

At the other end, swearing I’ll never fly Nationwide long distance again, I managed to find all my luggage and, eventually, Grant who’d kindly come to fetch me too.

It was great to be home, although I was feeling a little at a loss due to the fact that my organisational skills had vanished in the last few months I was in the UK and also Johannesburg is impossible without a car. This was not improved by the fact that I had managed to catch Claire’s cold / flu in the brief time I’d spent with her, so I pretty much hermitted myself away till I flew down to Cape Town a couple of days later.

And so there pretty much ends my recount. No more of the long winded “What I did on my holiday” type essay that most of us had to suffer writing at the beginning of school terms.

Things are still somewhat up in the air with my life. I’ve decided that for a variety of reason I’m not going to take the position in Cape Town as a full time job. However, I have said that if they’re amenable I’ll sign a three month contract – providing I don’t find a permanent position some time in this week. I’ve yet to hear if they’re amenable though. I’ve heard nothing from Monday’s interview. I’ve got an agent trying to put me forward for an utterly fantastic position, but she’d apparently having trouble pinning the client down. I’ve also got an interview with a company here for a three month contract, which sounds relatively fun, and is either offering too little, or a bit of a fortune depending on whether the money offered is for the whole period or per month.

I am pleased that my shipment from the UK has arrived, so at least I’ve got some more of my stuff! Stuff good! I’m figuring out methods to market myself in the new year if I land up in a contract till then. Otherwise I’m just really enjoying being back in Joburg with my freedom. Driving again is so much fun!

Also I’m trying to get Davis to actually tell me where TJF ZA trains. I managed to get times out of him when I emailed and said I was up in the province and free to come through, however he cunningly failed to give me the location. Arg. Pretoria is a fair-sized city and hence I can’t just drive round it asking random strangers “Excuse me, but do you know where I might find South Africa’s newest Jujitsu club?”

Part 3 (and more!)

2005-10-19T20:14:00.000+02:00

So right, I’d left off my most recent tale of personal stupidity: missing my flight to Barcelona.

Well, having bought a new ticket my plan landed in Barcelona early on Saturday afternoon and I found the apartment I was ‘borrowing’ without too much trouble. It was deep in the gothic quarters and cute in an archaic Mediterranean fashion. I was very glad I would be sleeping alone since I have never hear a bed protest so much!

Having dropped my stuff I proceeded to explore. I first took a walk up to the hub of the gothic quarters and decided to go into a cathedral there, which was amazing! However, what I hadn’t realised was it was the La Seu Cathedral (famed from many a post card) until I exited and walked round the side of it and finally saw it from the front!

The streets of Barcelona are beautiful, and I just walked through them marvelling. I eventually made my way down Las Ramblas and walked along there for a while. Along the way I found a local supermarket. Now I have a strange love of going into supermarkets in different countries – it gives a far great insight into what cultures consume, what they eat, plus as a designer I love looking at different packaging and I like buying brands that I’ve never seen before.

From there I then stumbled onto the fresh produce market, which was sensory feast in every way. I’ve never seen such fabulous fruit displayed so enticingly – although it was almost so perfect you wouldn’t have wanted to buy any for fear of ruining the display. The seafood was unbelievable, although I felt a little sorry for the critters still snapping their claws. The meat was impressive, but a little grim, and being a touch squeamish I avoided trying to identify the ‘bits’, and the skinless heads, and staring eyes were even more unpleasant. There was also veggies, spices, dried fruits and nuts, juices and cheeses (mmm…cheese!) I was so overwhelmed I couldn’t even bring myself to choose something to buy, so I left with just a photo or two.

From there I went back to the apartment with my now aching feet. However, during my rest I had the cunning to check my flight details to Paris, which I had though was for the next afternoon. How wrong, I was! My flight was for the Sunday morning, giving me less that 24hrs in Barcelona!

I was (understandably I think) a little upset by this, especially since I’m a huge fan of Gaudi’s and I hadn’t even got to see any of his buildings by that late hour, having planned to use the Sunday morning to view them. A quick check of my guide book revealed that the only site open late enough for time to decently appreciate was Park Guell, which I set out for post-haste. A hasty 1.5km charge and I was at the park before sunset. It was truly spectacular, and fantastic to see how Gaudi’s organic architecture complemented both the plants and the greater landscapes of Barcelona. (I’m starting to think now I might need to create a gallery…)

The next morning, after having had the experience of dining alone in the middle of a crowded formal restaurant, and being chewed out by an anal retentive traffic cop who spoke only Catalonian, I took a final walk around Barcelona appreciating the quiet of an early Sunday morning.

The flight to Paris was pleasant and devoid of the rushed stress of my prior journeys. I arrived in good time, to bad weather, still nursing my disappointment at having to leave Barcelona so soon.

I’d purchased a two day travel pass for the Monday and Tuesday which I paid through the nose for, but it was for all the zones, not just the 1 to 3 I wanted to travel in, but I’d failed to specify that and this was Paris. Paris probably needs tourists, but it doesn’t mean the French feel any need to be nice to them, especially if they speak English. It being the Sunday though I decided just to buy a ticket to Chauteu des Hallet and walk to my hotel which didn’t seem too far off.

Well, it was further than I thought and the walk was a bit uninspiring. I was staying near Republic, which was useful, but there was very little special about the area. In fact, compared to what I’d left, and even central London, it was dull and unattractive. The only thing that really made me happy was that there was a local supermarket less than 30 meters from the hotel!

Okay, maybe that’s just my prejudice against the French, but nowhere else have I been made to feel that speaking English is a shame and I was therefore somewhat of a pariah. And I did attempt to say things in French, however my pronunciation needs more than a little work and my grammar was probably criminal. Oh, well.

Unfortunately the weather remained glum for my entire stay in Paris, and the tiny (mostly ignored) soul of a photographer that I possess wept at the awful lighting.

On the Monday I went to the Louvre (Yes, I saw the Mona Lisa, yes, it is somewhat over-hyped) which was fantastic. I walked on to Notre Dame which they’ve cleaned, so it’s frothy and cream rather than darkly sooty. Somehow this just doesn’t work for me, gothic cathedrals should be, well, gothic. The French are busy ‘restoring’ a hell of a lot of their buildings, and bridges, and it’s all wrong to me. Old buildings should look like that, old! How else are you supposed to spot that they’re the real deal and not some ‘period-style’ building? Oh, well, it’s their city I guess, they can ‘restore’ all the buildings that want to.

I walked around a little of left bank, which was cute but quiet and then headed back to the hotel. In the evening I went to the Pompidour Centre for Modern Art. It was really cool, and such an odd building. I didn’t like it at first, but after it got dark and it was lit up, it looked amazing – a Japanese space-aged box in metal and glass.

On the Tuesday I did a bit of shopping and ran into a fellow group of South Africans (you have no idea what a relief it was to hear people speaking English with such a familiar accent) who I chatted to for a bit; and then kept running into for the next couple of hours.

The highlight of the trip was going to the Eiffel tower that evening. I’d decided not to visit it during the day, since I had a sense that I’d be disappointed. Plus I’m always one for lights, the more lights the happier I am (err, ish) and the Eiffel tower is really just one MF’er of a Christmas tree. It was actually fantastic. So gorgeous by night, and what I hadn’t realised was that at 9pm the real show starts! They turn on the flashing lights, only for ten minutes mind, but it’s an amazing thing to see. Wonderful!

The next day I returned to London, relieved to no longer have to deal with Europeans with no respect for ‘no smoking’ signs in airport, and overwhelmingly grateful to be somewhere that I could understand and speak the local language!

That afternoon I was to catch a bus to the New Forest – however I’ll leave that final short bit for later.

At the moment I’m getting prepared to leave Cape Town once more. I’m driving up to Johannesburg tomorrow morning. As always I’m sad to leave my parents, but at the same time I’m excited about being back in Joburg.

Cape Town is magnificently beautiful, but the people here are a little cliquey and with the result it’s hard to meet people and make new friends. I’ve got a fair number of great friends here, but many of them have left and a lot more are in the process of going too. The social groups I was a part of in my student years are broken and the result is that I occasionally feel that I’m a bit of a ghost coming back to haunt the relics of my past.

And to top it all off I’ve been practically offered a rather good job here. The money’s good, and were I a patient sort of person the position would be excellent. I could work there for a year or two, get a really great solid portfolio of work behind me. Then move on, join a bigger agency, earn a bucket as a senior designer, and in a decade or so I’d be the creative director, running my own studio, terrorising the juniors.

However, I’m not patient, and that’s not really where I want to be in the long term – or that is I don’t think that’s where I want to be in the long term. Why don’t I have any friends I could fob this excellent opportunity off on?

Plus the jujitsu classes down here scare me a little.

Ah, well, I’ve got a weekend to make up my mind in, so I guess I’m going to make the best of it. We’ll see come Monday what conclusion I’ve come to.

2005-10-11T18:28:00.000+02:00

On with the tales of my holiday…

Right, so I left the lake district on Sunday afternoon, sad to go, and even sadder to know that it will be a long time before I see any of the great people I met again. If ever. I caught a train to Edinburgh, a pleasant journey, and arrived in good time. With the help of a random stranger – who spotted the fact I was looking slightly confused – I managed to find my hostel.

In a fit of sheer genius I’d booked myself into a double with en-suite, absolute bliss after a weekend of communal dorms and shower rooms that stank. The weather in Edinburgh was lovely, and it was a gorgeous evening so I took a walk up the Royal Mile, half looking for the location of fabled firework show that was to happen later.

Edinburgh (well, the old part of it) is probably one of the loveliest cities I’ve been in. I knew very little about the place and it was magic to walk around ‘discovering’ all these beautiful buildings and views. I eventually found a flow of people, and then the flow of people petered out and there was a queue. So assuming this was a queue for the fireworks I joined it.

After standing there for five minutes I realised that, despite my conviction that I’m a Saffa through and through, I had just done the most English thing I could humanly conceive of doing (okay, maybe if I’d had a thermos of tea to keep me company that would have been one step further…) I had to share this so rang LaLa and spend the next while chatting to her, long enough for me to get to the end of the queue where I realised that, yes, it was for the fireworks, but it was for ticketed access to the Princess Street Gardens. Giggling to myself I climbed over a few booms and joined the rabble in Princess Street.

Time wore on and the hour for the fireworks came about. I’d managed to find myself a very good viewing spot, and the show was amazing. A co-ordinated show of hundreds and hundreds of fireworks set to the classical music piping up from the gardens below. The Castle looked like the scene of a battle during the lulls wreathed in smoke and lit up red. The final bang was such a massive explosion that standing a few hundred meters below it I could feel the heat and the pressure from it as it hit my face. It even set off a number of alarms in the shops in the area, and their wail cleared the street faster than the end of the spectacle and growing cold could have.

The next morning dawned, umm, dull and early. I had a three day bus tour of Scotland and Skye booked and I needed to be at the pick-up location at 8am. Fortunately that was 20 meters from the hostel.

The Haggis tour was good fun, but exhausting in it’s way. Hours and hours of sitting on a bus watching the country-side go by. The first day was sunny, the second gloomy and the third wet, so I guess I got to see Scotland in all the appropriate states. The heather was also in bloom, which was pretty, but all it served to do was set up a comparison to the Cape for me (since we’ve got a lot of heather, and a broader variety of kinds). I was home-sick already, and as lovely as the Highlands are, they’re not a patch on the Cape. At least our tour guide was interesting and he livened up the passing miles with anecdotes, history and personal observations.

Retuning to Edinburgh, a group of us from the tour had dinner followed by the best ice-cream sundae I’ve had in recent memory. When next in Edinburgh I thoroughly recommend going to the Bella Italia on the Royal Mile and having a ‘Godfather’ sundae (and ask for vanilla ice-cream instead of the cream!)

Anyway, the next day was a flurry of stress as I tried to get some shopping done for my gran, despite needing to be at the airport around 1, and being somewhat paranoid about missing flights. I’m the sort of person who if they recommend you’re there two hours before the flight, I like to set out allowing myself a further half hour ahead in case something goes wrong. I did succeed all round though and set out for the airport with a nice tartan blanket for granny in Buchanan colours.

I arrived back in London with a nightmare ahead of me. I had failed to calculate how long getting out of Stanstead and back home would take and arrived with less than an hour before I absolutely had to set off for Gatwick to make my flight to Barcelona that evening. To complicate things, I had yet to move out of my room, and the girl replacing me was moving in on the Sunday while I was gone, so I had to clear my stuff out before I left for the continent.

With a little help from a housemate I managed to clear my stuff out, re-pack my bag and I dashed out the door. I recall forgetting something and having to charge back for it, however it was only when I got to Victoria station, was seated on the Gatwick express (having missed the one I really needed to catch by a minute) contemplating if I’d make it to the EasyJet check in counter before it closed and feeling a little queasy about how exceedingly slim that possibility was that I realised that I’d managed to leave the keys to the apartment in Barcelona that I was borrowing in a bag at home.

Fortunately the Gatwick Express gives refunds. Unfortunately EasyJet does not. Fortunately I’d remember about the keys before I’d really gone anywhere. (Images of me arriving exhausted in Barcelona only to realise I had nowhere to stay left me exceedingly pleased that that had not happened!) Unfortunately the cheapest flight I could get for Barcelona was on Saturday morning giving me less than 24 hours in Barcelona and cost me more than a hundred pounds. However, overall I wasn’t totally disheartened. Missing my flight gave me time to calm down, clean my vacated room, sort the tip of stuff I’d left in the spare room, de-stress and I even got to go to Jitsu on the Friday night!

So enough of the holiday journal and back to present reality: I’ve bought myself a car, well, got dad to finance me a car that is, it’s a nice not-so-little Daewoo. It’s a bit old, but the mileage is low and it’s been well serviced. I suspect it’s somewhat of a gass-guzzler, but I’ve only put in a full tank last night so I’ll have to watch how fast I go through that.

The job offers have not been knocking down the door, but I’ve only been to see one agency since I’ve got back. At least they’ve been pleasant, positive and enthusiastic by appearances - you never really can tell with recruiters as being all of the above is part of the job description, but at least it’s better than the London agencies who tried hard to pretend I didn’t exist. I’m not keen on staying in Cape Town, but I’m also not going to turn down a great opportunity because of the location at this point.

A new begining.

2005-10-10T12:36:00.000+02:00

Well, all, welcome to the new home for my collection of rants and recollections. Whilst the CLAWsWiki has served faithfully for years, the era when the majority of people who I wanted to keep in contact with were members of that list is long since gone and with the recent almost two months of down-time on the site (and counting) I felt now was time for a change. So with that I will get on with the account of my recent travels:

While I was a fool to think that all my stress would end with my job, the Jitsu summer school was still a fantastic break from it all. The drive from London was very long and slightly infuriating for the fact that I would have been able to help if my driver’s licence hadn’t been stolen along with half my life in my bag a few weeks earlier. I’ve missed driving, and being unable to contribute just left me feeling anxious and frustrated. Also the available radio stations were kak, and the third passenger Dan was lifting had an aversion to The Cure.

We arrived in good time though, pitying the poor sods yet to leave from London. Had a bit of quiet time, then joined the mad rush up one hill carrying branches, back down it and then up another hill (now in the dark) due to a misunderstanding on where the ‘permitted’ firepits were. I had failed to bring a torch and resorted to having to use my mobile to find my way up and down that evening. In fact at points there were a horde of us stumbling backwards and forwards accompanied by the merry glow of our phones – a fairyland scene accomplished with modern technology and broken by the occasional “Shit, owh!” as feet managed to find what the phones didn’t

It was a great evening getting to know, in majority, the girls and boys from the jujitsu forum I frequent who were along for the weekend. I was exhausted however and after waiting past the point of dignity for someone else to be the first to go to bed I eventually caved. As is the case with these things I’d hardly got down the hill before a substantial portion of the crowd followed, since now they weren’t the official fader. It’s fine, since I believe how to “party all night with the knowledge that you have to get up and face Jitsu in the morning” is something only taught at green belt level (or in varsity clubs.)

The morning dawned far too early for those of us un-used to communal sleeping conditions. Those ‘poor sods’ who left so late from London had decided to make up for lost time on the partying – and not so silently too. On top of that the order of the hour was to get into our bathing costumes and take a plunge into the plunge pool. It was cold. So very very very cold. You became so very very very awake as a result. We’ll call it an ‘experience’.

The jitsu session itself was really interesting, but by that time the combination of the prior few weeks spent in constant stress and my lack of sleep caught up with me and caused a complete sense of humour failure. So after realising for the first time in well, ever, I wasn’t going through a jitsu session with a mad grin plastered to my face and turning my ankle while landing for the third time in ten minutes I decided to sit the last quarter of the session out.

In the afternoon the goal was to climb a mountain. A foolish one for someone with a damaged ankle, but I was in good company what with one of the forum lasses who’d damaged her knee. I never intended to go all the way to the summit, but we’d climb a distance, take a break, with me puffing, panting and eventually declaring “Okay, I’ll go up one more section, just one more, but no further.” Each time.

Eventually I gave up, but after five minutes of admiring the view on my own I noticed that I’d actually done 95% of the climb and it would be pathetic not to finish. It was fantastic to get to the top – although as always, we realised that there was a hell of a lot more mountain off in the distance yet to be climbed (explaining all the seemingly over-kitted people we’d passed going the other way.)

The rest of the weekend was great; I won’t be so quick to join in a game of “I have never…” again, broomstick contortions are still a skill I possess, while dips in ice-cold water may be excruciating, they do do wonders for your bruises and the Lake District is magnificent!

And so shall I end “Holiday Journal Part 1”. Meanwhile in present reality I’m back in Cape Town at home with the family with the intent of getting my CV and portfolio organised and buying a car.

It’s really nice to be home. I get fed, driven around, generally catered to. It’s wonderful. However, the down side is this case of lethargy I get every time I come home. I don’t know what causes it, but one of it’s side effects is it makes me somewhat anti-social. I’ve been here for almost a week and I’ve hardly seen anyone. Admittedly for most of last week I was, as my brother charmingly puts it “The International Plague Monkey” having come down with a case of flu I must have picked up in my last weekend in London which I’m still not entirely over.

I have found a Ju-jitsu class down here, but the sensei is away this week so no session.

On the CV and portfolio side nothing has happened. On the car side, we’re coming along merrily despite the fact that I can’t get a job without a car, I can’t get a car without finance and I can’t get finance without a job…